Home Alone

After being gone for nearly a week, Dave is still on the island working. He finally comes home tomorrow afternoon which is great, well for me not for him-for the next few days he's going to be my bitch. I'm almost 39weeks pregnant and between not having a car and running after Lily I need a break before baby decides to make its appearance. Actually I think it's more my parents' who need the break-they have been running after both Lily and I for the past week and we're both pretty demanding...and messy. To be honest I'm surprised the baby didn't come while he was away. I was expecting as soon as that ferry pulled away from the terminal my water would break but surprisingly everything has worked out. Is everything finally coming up Kali?
So how has my week been? Besides the creepy noises that seem to appear at night and all the shadows that look like axe murders but are really just chairs I've actually enjoyed myself. I've never lived by myself before I got married so its been a bit of a novelty. I've been able to slack off more than usual. I don't have to spend the day trying to look busy because I know that no one is going to come home and ask the most irritating question known to housewives everywhere: "so what did you do today?". Also I haven't had to make a lunch or dinner (been eating at my parents). Sure I'm going to be out of practice when it comes to crafting my special peanut butter and jam sandwiches and nuking leftovers, but not having to worry about dinner? bliss! Also as soon as Dave packed his bags, my house already started to look cleaner (read: he took his pile of clean jeans which he stores on the dresser instead of putting in the drawer with him) AND I don't have to clean the house after he comes home and leaves a trail of Dave piles. Plus don't get me started at peeing with the door open and walking around in my underwear....maybe men are onto something? In the words of Homer Simpson "Don't you hate pants?"
Now you're probably wondering what exactly I got up to. I mean really I could be going out and living the exciting life, however when you feel like the Michelin Man's obese sister you don't really want to slap on a pair of hot pants and party it up, plus that and toddler...so I've been housebound. I spent a lot of time with my secret lover-my new PVR. Yes, I love it so much it has replaced McDonalds as my side piece. I filled my PVR full of girly shows that Dave would scoff at. I've been rotting my mind with a steady diet of wedding reality shows, housewives from different cities and of course Star Trek TNG so I could drool over Will Riker in peace and without ridicule (that beard!). I've also been enjoying my mom's food and candy and free childcare. Here is a brief recap:

• DAY 1: Cleaned my house top to bottom including vacuuming. I then promptly left my house and went to my parents. Better to dirty up their house then mine. If I play my cards right I won't have to clean for at least another week or two. Shhh don't tell Dave, as far as he's concerned I cleaned every day all week!
• DAY 2: Crap! Dave usually takes care of the cat...no wonder why he tried to gnaw on my arm last night. Promptly watered and fed the cat. Cat still plotting my death. Hold me.
• DAY 3: I blew $50 on a dollhouse for Lily. Thought it would soften the blow that we're seriously going to mess up her world in 2weeks. "you're no longer the center of existence but ooh lookie here!". I'm sure Dave Loves how he works his butt off all week and I spend it in an afternoon.
• DAY 4: Took Lily to kinder cafe. That place is scary, like "Lord of the Flies" scary. I also collected more stuff to purge and take to the Salvation Army. Seriously, it's easier to get rid of Dave's stuff when he's not here.
• DAY 5: Took Lily to the park because all she wants to do at home is crawl all over me or hit me with the remote while I try to nap on the couch (or comb her hair with the toilet brush). My dad bought her a playhouse which BTW is nicer than the dump we currently live in (see photos here). I have a feeling after this week Lily and I will be kicked out of my parent's house and banished to the new "guest house" (at least they can hose off that plastic floor at the end of our visit).

Don't get me wrong, it's not like I don't miss Dave. However during his normal 8 day work week it's not like I see him that often. It will be nice to have him back even for that one or two hours a day to open jars and move heavy furniture.

On first impression it looks like she's being bad by shredding Dave's magazines but she's actually doing me a favor-now I have no choice but to toss them.