Anyways so far everything is looking good-head is down, heart rate good, growth ahead of schedule- Surprise, surprise, they are expecting another big MAC baby.
So how am I doing so far?:
- I stepped on the scale to inspect my weight gain progress. Gaining weight during pregnancy is important, sort of like getting off the couch every once in a while and not having cookies for dinner important. However it is hard for any woman to deal with the concept that weigh gain is okay. Yes there are some women who claim they love their pregnancy curves but I'm pretty sure they're lying through their teeth while crying into their chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. We spend our whole adulthood looking at the numbers on a scale and begging for them to go down or at least stay put. For some reason as soon as we get a positive pregnancy test, people expect us to get over this fact and do a happy dance as our digits go up. Did I mention we are also hit in the face with magazine articles about celebrities giving birth then climbing into a size 0 bikini? No pressure, gain that weight but it better be off before the photoshoot. I'll gain the weight because it's all about a healthy baby, but it doesn't mean I'm going to celebrate my pregnancy curves. Anyways I weighed myself and wasn't too worried with the number that showed up until I realized that it was in KGs and not LBS. Ouch. The good point is that within the next week I won't be able to see my feet and the numbers on the scale.
- I've had a real terrible pregnancy brain this time around. As you may have read from other posts I have done stupid things like introducing my cousin to his sister and asking if they have met before at Lily's birthday and shredding a government check. I have also missed 3 prenatal appointments so far. With my other two pregnancies I never missed a single one. Two days ago I had messed up my prenatal appointment. Right time wrong day (last time it was right day wrong time). Luckily they squeezed me in. Unlike my clothes the doctors office is more accommodating in that sense. I have also been hopeless at trying to learn how to work our cable. For the first week Dave got tired of me calling him at work asking him how to turn the TV on. I eventually got too embarrassed to phone to ask how to change the channel so I endured a few hours of Jerry Springer the first week. BTW why is everyone on that show surprised that they are on Jerry Springer, it's like cows before entering the slaughterhouse, they have that blank "I don't know whats going on and nothing bad can happen from being on this show" glare on their face. I can safely report that I can now change channels.
- I have entered the "whale" stage of pregnancy, meaning that I feel huge AND take up a lot of space as well. Not to mention people now go "oh you look huge!","you must be due REAL soon" etc etc. I feel sorry for every slow moving semi-truck I've passed on the highway in frustration. I mean when you're this big and heavy, there is no way you're moving fast. I have noticed that like the semi-trucks, people have the same tolerance for me and my slow moving ways. I have people getting inpatient with me when I'm on a crosswalk-pregnant and pushing a stroller- for walking too slow (I've even yelled at a idiot in a BAT that it's called a STROLLER for a reason),try to squeeze past me in the mall or walk directly behind me sighing on the sidewalk. I'm not asking for any special treatment, just a little more space. If you've been pregnant you know it's not like having stomach fat. Fat you can manipulate and suck in and adjust your space usuage. A baby bump isn't going anywhere. At least nature has given us a natural defense in this circumstance: Pregnancy gas. Seriously, if someone gets too close I'm crop dusting.
- Every pregnancy, right before the baby is born Dave ruins my maternity clothes. This is probably correlated with the fact that my nagging increases with each passing week about how he has to help a bit more around the house because I'm to pregnant to do stuff like bend. In return he gets this urge to all of a sudden do laundry. Some people say it's because he truly wants to help, but really, I think he's establishing incompetence. He knows that if he screws up once he'll be off the hook. When I was pregnant with Lily, he washed all my maternity clothes in hot water, and then threw my maternity pants that were under a no dryer order....IN THE DRYER. So not only did I have to lube myself into my clothes but my nicely hemmed pants were all of the sudden sporty capris...which would have been fine if it was not FEBRUARY. With only 3 weeks to go there was no point buying new ones so I had to walk around in flood pants. What did Dave do this time? Well I knew there was a problem when he lost his chap stick. Anyways last night I opened up the dryer and was greeted with the smell of peppermint. As I pulled out my grease stained clothes I found Dave's chapstick. It was in his sweater pocket and had go through the washer and dryer and now was consequently all over my maternity clothes. Dear Dave: As discussed please don't do laundry, that is my job. I don't go to your place of business and weld stuff.
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